It’s the final term and thoughts turn inevitably to a proper holiday. Possibly this idle desire also has much to do with the wettest drought on record. Not that I’m a sunbather. Any parent with a tan that isn’t out of a bottle (or, indeed, a flung jar of muddied poster paint) is, frankly, not doing its job. I recall my discreet pleasure at the comeuppance of a rather deliciously distracting mum in the slightest of bikini bottoms (no top), who lay down on the beach to bronze while I struggled to contain a small Trasha, who was busily handing out adoption papers to strangers and telling them of her life of cruelty at home, and her little brother. Who was locked-down in a pop-up tent anchored with stones. Thereby lending weight to his sister’s tale of woe. The lady leisurely applied lotion. Lay down again. And then, like an angel, appeared the most gorgeous of naked baby daughters (hers, not mine) lightly caked in sand who, on seeing her mother dozing, climbed on to her flat (of course) tummy to lay a perfect twirl of poo in her belly button.
First paragraph of her next book review. Not published yet.
You should buy her book (two posts down).


Pre-order a signed copy of Driving Jarvis Ham the brilliant new novel by Jim Bob. Published May 10th. Book a (free) ticket to the launch party at the shop May 10th at 7.30
This is being boosted in some quarters as the ‘new’ Beach. It’s not. It’s much better than that. Imagine, if you will, a cross between The Long Good Friday and Point Break. A physical novel closer to Tim Winton or Kem Nunn worth the price of admission for the diving scenes alone and a must for anyone who has ever dipped a toe in the water. Signed copies.
Now in stock, the brilliant new collection of stories by Dan Chaon. Published 7th February.
The latest McSweeney's with a poem from Bolano and a piece of Elmore Leonard.
A new collection of short stories from Tessa Hadley. The often unexpected, calmly told. Lovely cover too. Now watch them bork the paperback.
Lovely weed-fueled ramble across Britain in the dark. Fireworks, football, a bit of shagging, It could have been the worst thing I've ever read (not that not fond of all of the above). But it's not, it's good. Buy it for your boyfriend
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Buy a signed copy of Mark's very funny book.
One way or another the end of the world is coming. Beautifully, individually signed by Steven Appleby and Art Lester.
“In his own danceless life he couldn’t imagine anyone laughing on a November dawn but here it was. He tried to dismiss the image of three nude girls in the same bed but it was like trying not to think of a white horse.” Pete Dexter quoting Jim Harrison in his glorious review for the
Geoff Dyer's book of the year (The Guardian 26th Nov) It has a ramshackle loquacity, a down-home hyper-eloquence and an off-the-wallishness that is almost lapidary... And now James Wood reviews it in the
Books from America
Website
'Happy is a strong word.' The new, brilliantly written, novel from Dan Chaon.
Back then it was always sandals, bottom half of a flower-print bikini, faded Country Joe and the Fish Tshirt.

Wonderfully playful picture book featuring Tiny, Moonpie and Andre. Signed copies available.
Well aware that no animal has ever been sued for libel, Cheeta, star of Tarzan and Doctor Doolittle, tells it as it really was. Naughty boy.


Learn more about The Mousehunter - read the first chapter, buy a signed copy with exclusive free badge
Now with added Booker and Costa. This is what I said in February.
If you haven't already visited the website for this book, go there
I woke up in a foreign armpit. Buy a signed copy
The London boozer fully explained. Now smoke free. The funniest fucking book you will read all year. So funny in fact, that Steven Hunt is not allowed to carry a copy on public transport. Buy 




